1.Rapid City, South Dakota
(kinky friedman)
Just a ragged kid in overalls, he thumbed a ride one day
He told me, anywhere you're going's on my way.§
But as we passed by big al's drive-in his eyes began to flash
He was leavin' rapid city mighty fast.
He said, i hope to god she finds the good-bye letter that i
wrote her
But the mail don't move so fast in rapid city, south dakota.§
Well, he left her just a blanket of snow upon the farm
And that don't keep your conscience very warm.
He said his friends were too durn country and his pa was too
damn mean
And there weren't no money pumpin' gasoline.
And her gentle eyes, the merchandise of dreams the peddler sold
her
Who left her there alone in rapid city, south dakota.
Now the reason he was goin', i ain't sure i could say,
Might've been the rodeo in santa f？
there's a doctor in chicago, i know she'll be all right §
He told himself as he stared into the night.
And he said, i hope to god she finds the good-bye letter that i
wrote her
But the mail don't move so fast in rapid city, south dakota.§
And all her people treatin' her just like they never knowed her
Lord, the winter's passin' slow in rapid city, south dakota.
2.Popeye The Sailor Man
(kinky friedman ＆ panama red)
My heart is on my sleeve,
Do you still believe ？
Are you listenin' to the tide roll in, watchin' ships at sea ？
When i come sailin' home again will you be there for me,
There for me ？
Treasure ships of yore
Grace the ocean floor
Columbus sailed for italy, columbus sailed for spain.
Columbus sailed a wishin' well, columbus died in chains,
Died in chains.
I don't pretend to know every answer
To everything that life may ask of me.
Hey, i'm popeye the sailor man
I'm popeye the sailor man
Hey, popeye the sailor man
And i sail the lonely sea eternally.
My true love calls to me from far across the sea.
She says, red skies in the mornin'
Sailor take warnin'
Sail with me tonight
Sailor's delight, sailor's delight.§
I don't pretend to know every answer
To everything that life may ask of me.
Hey, i'm popeye the sailor man
Popeye the sailor man,
Popeye the sailor man
And i sail the lonely sea eternally.
She said, popeye the sailor man
Popeye the sailor man
Oh, popeye the sailor man
Sail on home to me, come sail with me.§
3.Homo Erectus
(kinky friedman ＆ panama red)
I left barber college
Searchin' for knowledge,
Went to the university.
I must confess, sir
This lady professor
She turned me on to anthropology.
Now i'm a homo erectus
Got to connect this
Bone that i discovered yesterday.
Tyrannosaurus
Lived in the forest,
Died because its heart got in the way.
Dear doctor howard
Come down from your tower
And join me for lunch at the y§.
Although you're thirty
I still think you're pretty
Let's give it that good ole college try.
＆cause i'm a homo erectus
Got to connect this
Bone that i discovered yesterday.
Tyrannosaurus
Lived in the forest,
Died because its heart got in the way.
Ok!
Hey jomo kenyatta
No, no, you're not a
Australopithecine boogieman.
It's took us a jillion
But we're all still here, been
Boogeyin' since boogeyin' began.
And i'm a homo erectus
Got to connect this
Bone that i discovered yesterday.
Tyrannosaurus
Lived in the forest,
Died because its heart got in the way.
You know i'm a homo erectus
Got to connect this
Bone that i discovered yesterday.
Tyrannosaurus lived in the forest,
Died because its heart got in the way.
You know that i'm a homo erectus
Got to connect this
Bone that i discovered yesterday.
Tyrannosaurus
Lived in the forest,
Died because its heart got in the way.
I'm but a homo erectus
Got to connect this
Bone that i discovered yesterday.
Tyrannosaurus
Lived in the forest,
Died because its heart got in the way.
Watch out for homo erectus ...
4.Lover Please
(billy swan)
Lover please, please come back
Don't take that train goin' down the track.
Don't please don't, don't leave me
Don't you leave me here in misery.
You would never hold me so near
You would never call me dear.
Don't you know i'd die for you
Now you're gone and that's what i'll do.
Lover please, please come back
Don't take that train goin' down the track.
Don't please don't, don't leave me
Don't you leave me here in misery.
Well, it's an old, old story, not too long,
About a love that went all wrong.
Girl left the boy, oh so bad
Now she gone and she oh so sad.
Lover please, please come back
Don't take that train goin' down the track
Don't please don't, don't leave me
Don't you leave me here in misery.
Oh, lover please, please come back
Don't take that train goin' down on the track
Don't please don't, no don't leave me
Don't you leave me here in misery.
Lover please, please come back
Don't take that train goin' down the track
Don't please don't, don't leave me
Don't you leave me here in misery.
5.Wild Man From Borneo
(kinky friedman)
I'm the star of captain midnite's travelin' show
Came to this circus many moons ago.
My mother's in your storybooks, she loved a jungle king,
Left me standin' here alone inside the center ring.
In a bamboo cage i crossed the ragin' sea,
A livin' page torn clean from history.
A hairy, scary, legendary screamin' souvenir,
Now don't you come too close to me, don't you come too near.
I'm the wild man from borneo,
The wild man from borneo.
You come to see what you wanna see,
Ah, you come to see but you never come to know.
The tattooed lady left the circus train
Lost all of her pictures in the rain.
I wonder if you're happy, i wonder if you're free
I wonder if you'll ever know the mark you left on me.
I'm the wild man from borneo, the wild man.
You come to see what you wanna see,
Ah, you come to see but you never come to know.
We come to see what we want to see,
Oh, we come to see, but we never come to know.
6.Before All Hell Breaks Loose
(kinky friedman)
Time to resign from the human race
Wipe those tears from your lovely face
Baby, wave to the man in the ol' red caboose
Before all hell breaks loose.
Before you go i wish you'd come
Before you leave wish you'd love me some.
I'll give you all of the dreams you can use
Before all hell breaks loose.
All right!
Now i know what the gypsy meant
When he told me i'd never be president.
He said, adopt a korean, kill you a moose
Before all hell breaks loose. §
You poked fun at my cowboy shoes,
You said they looked just like big canoes.
Now it's time for the chosen ones to choose
Before all hell breaks loose.
Turn out the lights, honey, turn on the news
God save the queen and the kangaroos
And what kind of rubbers did joseph use
Before all hell broke loose.
Time to resign from the human race,
Wipe those tears from your lovely face.
Baby, wave to the man in the ol' red caboose
Before all hell breaks loose.
Hell on america!
7.Somethin' S Wrong With The Beaver
(kinky friedman ＆ panama red)
She climbed the stairs that mornin'
Found him rather pale
His eyes they were the color
Of half-drunk ginger ale.
Faithful as a magnavox
Hung-up on a song
She cried down to the breakfast nook,
ward, there's something wrong.§
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
The beaver i believe-uh is gone.
Beaver was a dreamer
Never got it right
Died in livin' color
Lived in black an' white.
Faithful as a magnavox
Hung-up on a song
She cried down to the breakfast nook,
ward, there's something wrong.§
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
The beaver i believe-uh is gone.
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong with the beaver
Somethin's wrong.
8.When The Lord Closes The Door(He Opens A Little Window)
(kinky friedman ＆ jeff shelby)
When i find myself alone in my house and in my head
And i blow the candles out and i take myself to bed
And i'm old enough to realize, ah, young enough to know
When the lord closes the door, he opens a little window.
When sleep closes my eyes and sends me searching for you
And i'm feelin' blue as the sky without your love to carry me
through
And i'm weak enough to be afraid but strong enough to let it
show.
When the lord closes the door, he opens a little window.
Baby i'm a gypsy boy, i'll ride the night until
I come to you like moonlight through your raggle-taggle window
sill.
When you find yourself alone in your house and in your head
And you blow the candles out and you take yourself to bed
And you're old enough to realize, ah, young enough to know
When the lord closes the door, he opens a little window.
9.Miss Nickelodeon
(jay wise)
Kinda like an indian beatin' on his mandolin
Lucky paul and his asian friend,
Smilin' back from the place they're in.
Hero's mother hides in austin waitin' for a loan
Preacher's teachers boogie down in saigon,
Tryin' to make it on their own.
Injun ladies with their cement hair,
Snub ulysses on the stair
I believe he's up there sellin' kitchen wares,
Tryin' to make it back to sweden.
Ah, kinda like an indian beatin' on his mandolin
Lucky paul and his asian friend,
Smilin' back from the place they're in.
Glad to see you on the mend,
Oh, miss nickelodeon,
Guess you got the stuff i could not send,
Roll it over again.
Trip in from ＆43,
A magic boy, his dog and me.
On a run to eternity
Not carin' what it's costin'.
Oh, kinda like an indian beatin' on his mandolin
Lucky paul and his asian friend,
Smilin' back from the place they're in.
Oh, kinda like an indian beatin' on his mandolin
Lucky paul and his asian friend,
Smilin' back from the place they're in.
Oh, kinda like an indian beatin' on his mandolin
Lucky paul and his asian friend,
Smilin' back from the place they're in.
Oh, kinda like an indian beatin' on his mandolin
Lucky paul and his asian friend ...
10.Autograph
(kinky friedman ＆ panama red)
Ain't you the golden boy
Of the silver screen,
Your mother's pride and joy,
The promoter's dream.
No time for autographs
Or sailin' boats or trains.
No time for dreams to last,
You gotta catch that plane.
One magic midnight show,
She taught you how it feels,
Once, oh so long ago,
When rock ＆ roll was real.
Turn on your radio,
The words you hear are mine.
Shoulda told you long ago,
But i never had the time.
11.They Ain't Makin' Jews Like Jesus Anymore
(kinky friedman)
Well, a redneck nerd in a bowling shirt was a-guzzlin' lone star
beer
Talking religion and-uh politics for all the world to hear.
they oughta send you back to russia, boy, or new york city one
You just want to doodle a christian girl and you killed god's
only son.§
I said, has it occurred to you, you nerd, that that's not very
nice,
We jews believe it was santa claus that killed jesus christ.§
you know, you don't look jewish,§ he said, near as i could
figger
I had you lamped for a slightly anemic, well-dressed country
nigger.
No, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore,
They don't turn the other cheek the way they done before.
He started in to shoutin' and a-spittin' on the floor,
lord, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore.§
He says, i ain't a racist but aristitle onassis is one greek we
don't need
And them niggers, jews and sigma nus, all they ever do is breed.
And wops ＆n micks ＆n slopes ＆n spics ＆n spooks are on my list
And there's one little hebe from the heart of texas is there
anyone i missed ？ §
Well, i hits him with everything i had right square between the
eyes.
I says, i'm gonna gitcha, you son of a bitch ya, for spoutin'
that pack of lies.
If there's one thing i can't abide, it's an ethnocentric racist;
Now you take back that thing you said ＆bout aristitle onassis.§
No, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore,
We don't turn the other cheek the way we done before.
You could hear that honky holler as he hit that hardwood floor
lord, they sho' ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore!§
All right!
No, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore,
We don't turn the other cheek the way they done before.
You hear that honky holler as he hit that hardwood floor
Lord, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore.
Everybody!
They ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore,
They ain't makin' carpenters who know what nails are for.
Well, the whole damn place was singin' as i strolled right out
the door
lord, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore!§
No, we ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore,
We don't turn the other cheek the way they done before.
Well, the whole damn place was singin' as i strolled right out
the door
lord, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore!§
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